Today isnt a good day i dont think!
im home for the weekend but where i am meant to be feeling happy and excited to see my friends and family im feeling a little blah about it all.
dont get me wrong i love the friends and family but i cant help feeling that im out of place.
family for instance i have missed the last two months in their lives and a lot has changed. my sisters wedding is nearly all organised and i havent been part of it. my little brother has started a new school for disabled kids and i have missed it. my little sister has done a school play and i have missed it. when i got home no one was even in so i went and sat in the back garden with my dogs and i got a little tearful thinking about the things i have missed. when they all came home my little brother wouldnt hug me or let me give hima bath like i used to all the time. maybe its just me being a bit sensitive i dunno 
then theres friends. we are all at uni apart from two who bum about at home. we speak to eachother everyday either by txt,msn or myspace about what we are all up to and we plan to meet up. seeing Hus today made me really bummed out as even things with him has changed. he has a gf at uni and she is coming to stay with him in the second week of the holidays. this made me feel a little pushed out not the fact he has a girlfriend just the fact i was the last to know and i know he has his reasons why but it still hurts.
saying goodbye to Kay made me sad and she cried at the station i feel guilty that she is back at uni with no one for two nights. i personally would hate it and i did say to her she could come home with me but she felt intrusive
anyway i am moany and this isnt making for a good read!
byeeeee x
